REB #17: “In this case, kill Marlon. He gets on my tits.”

– Liam Hammond, a poster on the Aaron’s Story blog

According to Urban Dictionary, the phrase “gets on my tits,” which I’d never heard until today, is (1) a “verb used to signify a singular subject that bothers you” or (2) a “verb to describe someone who pisses you off.” It can also be used in the plural (“get on my tits”). The (singular) example sentence is the following: “Senseless violence really gets on my tits.”

Aside from the fact that user “ejito” of Urban Dictionary is technically wrong – it’s a verb phrase, not a verb, and may even have other names as well – I find his/her definition rather intoxicating. It uses the word “tits” in a way that not only evokes the proper mood, tone, and branding of a website called Urban Dictionary but also reminds me that there is a big world out there, with tons and tons of languages, idioms, and slang words/phrases.

Before today, I never would have thought to say or write something like, “He really gets on my tits” – or, to push the definition to its limits, “Geez, would you get off my tits already?” Maybe that’s because I don’t have any literal tits to get on (unlike Michael Moore, apparently), but it’s also because I didn’t grow up with that particular phrase. One reason I love traveling is that I get to see how people talk in different parts of the U.S. and the world. I suppose, in this case, the Internet rendered traveling unnecessary. I was able to sit in the comfort of my own home, on my bed, and read all about how to get on someone’s tits, and then write about it, properly.

Today, I’m a happy writer.

*NOTE: This blog entry is syndicated from a blog I had to start for my Electronic Publishing class at U.B. this semester. I may or may not delete the extraneous blog when the class is over, but I thought I would at least give my readers the opportunity to read the contents of that blog indefinitely.

Technology Has Me in a Twitter

Until I started reading The Elements of Typographic Style, I never thought about the productivity aspect of why reading from a screen is worse than reading from a printed page. I’ve always thought/heard that the backlighting is killer (and, really, it does harm the reading experience, to an extent, at least any long reading). But it also makes sense what Bringhurst says: when we’re on a computer, we have a different mindset.

With the way technology is advancing, we are constantly looking for speed, speed, speed. For book reading, there is no default speed; it’s whatever your reading speed is. With a computer/iPhone/iPad/etc., there is Internet connection speed and processor speed and RAM and all that junk to worry about. It all affects the speed and enjoyability of the reading experience.

On a computer, we just want to get through as many things as possible, as fast as possible. We want to feel productive. With computers, and technology in general, becoming more and more integrated into our lives, that feeling isn’t going to change any time soon. With each new protocol and website and API and programming language (and so on), technology becomes more useful (or, in some cases, “useful”) and, thus, sucks up more and more of our time. The problem is that some of us (myself included, unfortunately) find ourselves unable to function if we don’t get our fix of political news on Twitter or mass messages on Facebook or TV shows on computer. Or just…whatever.

Technology is amazing, but it’s probably the most frustrating black hole since – well, since the black hole.

On that note, an update on my most recent time sucker: there’s been a bit of a delay on TwitTV, but I’m working on that in the next few days. I’m going with Smallville for the veteran show, and since Lonestar was cancelled (as I predicted elsewhere), my new show to follow will be No Ordinary Family, which premiered to more than 10 million viewers last night, even though the pilot has been online for over a month (I think that’s right, anyway). It may fall like a rock (like FlashForward did last year), but I’ll follow it for the long haul this season, even if that happens to be just a few months (in which case…maybe I could find something new in the spring).

REB #10: “Navigation is power of a limited sort – it enables us to manage the immensity of the media torrent.”

– Todd Gitlin

Next up, if you haven’t already guessed: the navigation of my website.

As Vinny mentions on his navigation post, simplicity is key. I’ve thought a lot about different navigation methods, and I keep coming back to two time-tested ideas: (1) a horizontal header with a horizontal navigation bar underneath it, right along the top of the page or (2) a horizontal header at the top and a vertical navigation bar on the left. Some web designers choose to put the navigation bar on the right (or they utilize a left and right design). I’m not considering that at this point because I prefer the left side. Perhaps that decision is subconsciously linked to politics; more likely, it’s because I was raised in a country that reads from left to right.

However, as I was brainstorming, I decided to go out on a limb: I want to try putting my navigation bar on the bottom of the site. It’s a risky move, in a way, but it’s also a very familiar paradigm for the average computer user, who has to use a “start” menu or a dock of icons (both of which are at the bottom of the screen, by default) to launch his or her applications. I want my website to be easy to use, and I think that having the navigation bar on the bottom is just as easy as having it on the top—but it’s just different enough to be mildly refreshing and interesting, while still providing that sense of familiarity we’ve been discussing. If I do end up deciding on this design, I’ll want my navigation bar to look similar to a computer dock, so I’ll be creating buttons that remind the user of icons. In fact, I’ve already made a few in PhotoShop. In any case, these buttons will allow the user to move comfortably from page to page.

The biggest departure from this will/would be the hypertext story that I may or may not create (I just need time), because the links to navigate the story would be in the story itself, not on a menu. Seemingly random words would take the reader to a new experience, a new definition, a new page. The choices the reader makes would affect the story’s message, perhaps its actual outcome. Of course, this is all assuming I can come up with the right story concept.

*NOTE: This blog entry is syndicated from a blog I had to start for my Electronic Publishing class at U.B. this semester. I may or may not delete the extraneous blog when the class is over, but I thought I would at least give my readers the opportunity to read the contents of that blog indefinitely.

REB #9: “Once you know what the story is and get it right—as right as you can, anyway—it belongs to anyone who wants to read it. Or criticize it.”

– On Writing by Stephen King

This week, we’re writing about our author/artist websites, which we will be designing and potentially publishing over the course of the next month. First up: the content of my site.

I’ve had a blog for almost a year now, one that I’ve actually managed to update on a fairly regular basis. I’ve tried to start blogs before but have never stuck with them. That said, since I’ve already got a blog started, I would like to try to incorporate it in some way. But that topic is better suited for my forthcoming posts on navigation and design, so I’ll go into more detail in the next two posts.

On this blog, I do have an “about me” page, a résumé page, a favorites page (favorite books, movies, and TV shows), and even a page to post completed/published stories, books, videos, and other projects (which I’ve done nothing with, as of yet). I’m trying to think of the best way to integrate all this information into the new website or if I even want to; I’m not sure just yet. My best bet may be to keep it on the blog and use the website for something else.

In any case, I’ve already started playing with Dreamweaver—and even tried out a couple of designs—but right now, my favorite design uses the controversial frames method, with a header on the top, a menu on the bottom, and the content in the middle (again, more to come on design and navigation in a future post). If that’s confusing, I’ll try to explain: these are all in the same browser window but are in separate “frames” (kind of like picture-in-picture for the Internet).

The content that appears in the middle frame, so far, consists of a page on which I can list my published works, an about me page, and even my entire blog (with the header and menu intact, in their respective frames, which doesn’t look great with the blog design but could be worse). I’m struggling to come up with more content for the middle frame of the home page, though, the one the reader sees first. As I said in a comment on Mike’s blog, I would also like to include a hypertext narrative of some kind (and maybe some other stories that I’ve written), but that will take a lot of time and effort to (1) write and (2) implement correctly; I suppose it’s something that will evolve over time, even if I have to work on it beyond the deadline for class.

*NOTE: This blog entry is syndicated from a blog I had to start for my Electronic Publishing class at U.B. this semester. I may or may not delete the extraneous blog when the class is over, but I thought I would at least give my readers the opportunity to read the contents of that blog indefinitely.

Ex-Mayors and Horror Stories

Sorry there haven’t been any updates in a while, if anyone’s been reading. I have so many stories, but I can’t possibly remember them all.

I’ll start with what happened today and see what I remember from there.

I was working—and actually, I’m working right now, so I have to make this quick—and we had a last-minute equipment delivery. Rustam and I had to take a projector over to Institutional Advancement at UB for a conference they were having, but we didn’t realize we would need an extension cord for it; we didn’t know the table was so far from the power outlet. So he went back to get one while I continued setting up the projector. And the woman in charge of the conference actually said this to me, or really just to the room: “Man, you guys are about as prepared as I am.”

First of all, she called us last-minute and expected perfection. Never going to happen! Second, she couldn’t get Outlook to open, and she didn’t know how to log in to the website she needed. Yeah, I think she could have been a little more grateful.

AWKward. It wasn’t our fault you forgot or that you’re having a bad day!

Oh well. I didn’t say anything. At least not until I left.

But on the way out, Rustam and I saw ex-Mayor of Baltimore Sheila Dixon coming out of the Starbucks on North Charles in Mount Vernon. A guy stopped us at the crosswalk and pointed at her, subtly. “Isn’t that mayor Dixon?” he asked. And I’m 99% sure it was. Looked just like her. Shouldn’t she be in jail or something? She must have been spending her last unclaimed gift card at Starbucks!

When I got back to the office, Shirley came out and congratulated me. “For what?” I said. Then she told me I got the second-highest score on the what-do-you-know test we took at work a couple of weeks ago (for orientation part 2). Woohoo! That’s something, I guess. I know what I’m doing at work!

Suck on that, Institutional Advancement lady. 😉 Have a better day tomorrow.

*sigh*

Okay, new topic. Movies!

I went and saw The Crazies last weekend—with Kari, Mike, and Eli—and it was GREAT! It was much more impressive than Shutter Island, which just drove us (Kari, Mike, Lori, and me) crazy with terrible dialogue and clichéd plot “twists” that read as cop outs. Scorsese was really backed into a corner with that movie. Anyway, The Crazies was actually pretty great, even had some good acting.

Tonight, I might be going to see Alice in Wonderland with Justin. I’m excited!

Aardvark: Cooking and Technology

Heard of Aardvark? Google recently acquired the company for $50 million and will, no doubt, do something amazing with it. But it really doesn’t have very far to go. Aardvark is already an outstanding service, and I can only imagine what Google will do with it. In my mind, it is a great companion for Google Buzz, on which users can follow each other and share information—and even save their location if they use Buzz on a cell phone with GPS, so “Nearby” users can answer questions from people in their area.

Aardvark is a cross between Google Buzz/Twitter and Google the search engine. It is, in effect, a social search engine. One simply has to ask a question and wait for an answer from a knowledgeable user—or, vice versa, answer a question if he/she knows the answer. Aardvark is a way to search without knowing exactly what to look for (i.e., in Google or some other search engine). Aardvark describes itself as “a new kind of tool that lets you tap into the knowledge and experience of friends and friends-of-friends.” All users have to do is set up their areas of expertise and interest when setting up their accounts. From time to time, depending on their settings, they will receive a question to try to answer if they want to do so, and they can also ask questions to be answered.

I haven’t done the greatest job explaining this, so here’s an example. I used Aardvark the other night while making biscuits from a pre-made batch of baking powder biscuits that I got for Christmas. Previously, when I mixed up some of the batter and baked it, I thought the final product tasted too baking powdery. I thought it could have been that the biscuit mix had too much baking powder in it, but I wondered if there was another reason.

So I asked Aardvark. One can ask a question via the website, the iPhone app, e-mail, Twitter, or even IM (I have my GMail Instant Messaging account set up for Aardvark). This time, I chose the iPhone route, since I was in the kitchen. I got 4 responses within minutes.

I asked, “Is there any way to lessen the taste of baking powder in baking powder biscuits? They also [sic; it’s supposed to say “always”…my bad!] seem kind of…bitter, I guess.”

I got the following in response:

1) “Many baking powders contain aluminum, which can give a bitter taste. You might consider trying an aluminum-free baking powder.

You can find a list of aluminum-free baking powders at http://bowlofplenty.blogspot.com/2009/02/baking-powder_16.html#aluminum.” –Jonathan P.

2) “Aluminum-free baking powder http://www.culinate.com/articles/features/baking_powder.” –Timothy N.

3) “The only time I get that problem is when I add too much. Double-check your recipe?” –‘Lin L.

4) “Make sure you are using a baking powder that contains calcium phosphate (like Rumford or Clabber Girl)–they are less bitter. Also, I add a couple of teaspoons of sugar to mine.” –Pamela J.

Granted, not all of this was helpful to me at the time, because the biscuits were pre-mixed, in a jar, but I did try adding a little sugar, and I added a tiny bit more flour as well. When I make my own biscuit mix, in the future, I’ll try to find some aluminum-free baking powder.

Thanks for the tips, Aardvark! 🙂

I also asked about the durability of a TiVo and whether or not it is worth it to buy the lifetime subscription (used to be $200, now it’s $400 because of HD capabilities, I believe). I got several great, objective responses, and now, I’m thinking of buying a TiVo with a lifetime subscription, instead of paying monthly for it. Assuming it lasts longer than about 3 years (most people said they’ve had theirs since 2000 and that they’re still working but that they’ve replaced the hard drive once or twice, which is normal), I’ll end up paying less than if I paid monthly. Plus, it’s possible to transfer the lifetime subscription to a new TiVo in extreme cases. I’ll have to wait a while, but I know now that a TiVo would be a good option for me. Maybe sometime in the next year, I’ll go for it.

I also want to get a new digital camera. I had originally wanted to get the Nikon D5000 with 2 VR lenses, which would be around $800-$900, but since I’m also looking at a TiVo (which would be about $399 for the HD-capable machine with a good-size hard drive plus $399 for the subscription), I’m thinking of going with a point-and-shoot. It would be cheaper and smaller, so I could take it around with me, whereas with the Nikon I’d only use it for special occasions and photography projects since its more cumbersome to carry around. I’m not advanced enough for that yet anyway. The Canon Powershot S90 looks fantastic, and it would help me ease myself into “prosumer” photography. It’s a point-and-shoot/DSLR hybrid. It has manual features but is small and light. I’ve heard great things about it. And it’s only about $400. While I preferred to stick to Nikon for lens compatibility (my current camera, a Coolpix 3200, is Nikon), if I’m getting a camera that can’t even change lenses, I might as well go with the best one I can find. One rule of thumb I’ve heard is buy Nikon for DSLR cameras (the big nice ones with multiple lenses) and Canon for point-and-shoots.

So far, I agree. I’m considering getting the Canon point-and-shoot sometime this year and maybe getting the Nikon in a few years, once I’ve gotten more used to the “prosumer” category and can justify the cost.

Vimeo vs. YouTube

I’ve been signed up with Vimeo for a while now, but I’ve never really done much with it. In a nutshell, it’s YouTube for professionals and semi-professionals. Vimeo doesn’t allow commercials, trailers, or any content to which the uploader doesn’t own the copyright. It’s more policed than YouTube. That means no TV shows or “fanvids.” It is for serious filmmakers and creative types, not really for vlogs and “Look what my kid can (and I forced him/her to) do!”

Here’s a sample video from Vimeo: Kid Sam – We’re Mostly Made of Water (Dir. Sherwin Akbarzadeh) from Sherwin Akbarzadeh.

There are some really cool videos on the site. Check it out! I like it.

I might post my YouTube videos, from my video production class at Wabash, on Vimeo. It seems like a good avenue for them.

I’d love to make more videos like that someday.

Baltimore Blizzard Bastard; Second Semester Starts; Sorry, So Sorry

*Sorry I haven’t been updating you. It’s been hectic. But maybe that’s not an excuse. Anyway, I wrote this as an e-mail to a family member and thought it was actually perfect for a blog entry. So here you go, blog reader(s)! A slight adaptation of a family e-mail. Pry away into my private life, gentle readers!

Hello,

I’ve been busy with school starting back up. Last week was my second week of class; this week will be the third—assuming we have class, that is. I love it, but there’s a lot going on.

I’m taking a screenwriting class this semester (along with a fiction workshop and a class on experimental writing, called Experimental Forms). It’s neat that part of my work for class is to watch movies and TV shows, and then analyze scripts! Exciting. In fact, I just finished reading the screenwriting textbook for that course a couple of hours ago. It’s really interesting to me, so I decided to just read it all. Besides, I thought it would be good to have read and annotated it already so I can just use it to refer back to while I’m working on my script ideas. That frees up larger blocks of time later on, even though it took longer than I expected to read the book initially! Now I can just refresh my memory real quick on those days where I’m supposed to have read a section (he assigned it in 4 large chunks, to be spaced out between early February and late March, after which time we are going to be writing our scripts), and then I can focus on my ideas and perfecting my writing craft and document styles.

This is the closest I’ve ever been to what I want to do with my life. It’s shaping up to be an exciting, productive, educational semester for me.

As for the Baltimore snow, yeah, we apparently got about 28 inches of snow Friday/Saturday. It’s pretty crazy here. I live close to campus, though. It’s just a couple of blocks away. We don’t have campus housing at UBalt. Baltimore’s not really equipped for that, I guess, or perhaps it’s just UBalt that has that issue. There’s barely enough room for the class buildings! Haha. We have partnerships with a few of the local apartment buildings, though; mine is one of them. It’s called Sutton Place. Actually, I can look out my kitchen window and see the Student Center—big glass building, can’t miss it.

Kari and I have a great view, here at our apartment. It looks especially pretty right now, with all the snow. I should take pictures if I can remember to.

Speaking of pictures, I need to save for a new camera, eventually; this one’s about had it. After being spoiled with expensive/nice video cameras and learning a lot about manual controls in my video production class at Wabash last spring, I now want a still camera that is more up-to-date and has more creative control than my ailing Nikon Coolpix 3200. Nikon’s D5000—the one on Amazon with 2 VR kit lenses, one at 18-55mm and the other at 55-200mm—looks pretty great for a first-timer, with manual controls and everything, but it’s expensive. Not even a priority right now. I need to read more about photography anyway so I know what I’m doing with it if/when I finally get one! And then there’s the worry that I won’t actually use it enough to warrant buying. I certainly don’t use my current camera that often (I use my iPhone camera more!), but maybe I would use a newer one more. Who knows?

Ah, I’m starting to babble. I supposed I should go to bed.

Stay warm, Baltimoreans et al.!

Best,

Roger

In D.C. – The National Equality March

As I said in my previous post, I went to Washington D.C. this weekend with my friend Lori to march for GLBT equality. And it was amazing.

Going in, I had no idea what to expect. I didn’t know how many people would be there or how they would be reacting. I didn’t know what the police would be like or how such a march would be coordinated. Would it be chaotic? A riot? Would I have to fight to stay on my feet and avoid being trampled to death? How easy would it be to stay with my group of four (myself and three others)?

I was pleasantly surprised when my group got downtown. I saw facets and sights I hadn’t really seen, or in some cases considered, before this weekend. I saw groups of people on the Metro carrying colorful signs (and some were colorful in the literary sense of the word; but I’ll leave them to your imagination). 😉 Lesbians leaning on their partners’ shoulders, gay men with their arms around one another. On the Metro! In the streets! It seemed so simple and felt like it should have always been that way.

However, it’s not always that way. People are afraid to be who they are, for fear of persecution, but today was our day, the day for gays, lesbians, bisexuals, transgenders, and GLBT supporters to come out in droves and give one another the courage to be who we all are. The courage to fight for rights we have so long wanted but never been able to have. And for some of us, the courage to fight for rights we don’t necessarily need for ourselves but know others deserve, rights that have long been denied (and for no good reason).

When the march got underway, I found most of the answers to my questions rather quickly. It was anything but a riot. It was a little chaotic because there were so many people, but that was the only reason. Police were cooperating. They were there to help us, protect us, and it felt wonderful to have that support. While we had been crowded pretty close together before the march started, once we were walking, we could spread out nicely. There was no real danger of being trampled, thankfully. Christmas shoppers could learn a thing or two from this group of queers and queer supporters. 🙂

When we finally got to the Capitol building, two young men spoke; I think both of them were teenagers, still in high school or maybe just out of high school. One was straight, and the other was gay. Both young men spoke with an eloquence I could never dream of having, especially at such a young age. Even now, I envy them. I envy their courage to speak to hundreds of thousands of people—but more importantly, I envy their courage to speak up on something as important and dividing as GLBT issues. I couldn’t have done it at their respective ages. I’m still not sure I could today.

We also listened to speeches by the organizers of the event, a particularly powerful one by the head organizer. Cynthia Nixon, an award-winning actress perhaps best known for her role as Miranda on Sex and the City, even showed up to march and gave a rousing oratory on fighting for equality and on her own struggle to marry her partner of almost five years. Judy Shepard, mother of hate crime victim Matthew Shepard, spoke to us as she has spoken to many GLBT/supporters over the years. Lady Gaga marched (and may have performed, but if she did, I wasn’t there by that point). Kristin Chenoweth tweeted that she marched as well; I would have loved to have seen her and congratulated her on her well deserved Emmy.

After I left the rally, I checked Twitter on my iPhone because I hadn’t been able to get an Internet connection during the rally. Preliminary guesses put the crowd at 100,000 to 150,000, most likely more. When I saw this, I remembered a moment about thirty minutes into the rally when someone announced that we were still seven blocks deep, even with all the people that had already arrived on the Capitol mall. Seven blocks deep, thirty minutes into the rally! Insane.

Thinking back on the day, I am not in the least surprised that the openness continued throughout the day; even on Metro ride back, people were holding each other. Safety in numbers, perhaps, and there were plenty of those to go around today. But I wonder…tomorrow, will D.C. show any signs of GLBT life? Will there be a man holding his partner in public? A woman? Will GLBT America go back into the closet tomorrow, or will it stay out and continue the fight? Perhaps one of the most memorable and poignant moments from today comes to mind now: to get into the rally, many of us had to climb, literally, over a stone wall.

If that isn’t symbolic, I don’t know what is. The National Equality March was a new kind of Stonewall, a protest for a newer generation; and I hope the feeling lasts months, if not years. Or forever.

GLBT America (and the world) deserves it.